CHAPTER 44
GOD showed in all the revelations, often, that we work his will and his honour constantly and without stinting. And the nature of this work was shown in the first showing in a marvellous example. There it was revealed in the working of the soul of our blissful Lady, Saint Mary; that is, the working of truth and wisdom. And I hope, by the grace of God, to tell it as I saw it.
Truth sees God, wisdom beholds God and from these comes the third; that is, a holy and marvellous delight in God, which is love. Where truly there is truth and wisdom, then truly there is love, arising from them both. And this is all of God’s making, for he is endless sovereign truth, endless sovereign wisdom and endless sovereign love, unmade; while the human soul is a creature in God who has the same nature, though made; and it does what it was made for forever: it sees God, beholds God and it loves God. In this manner, God and his creature in one another enjoy each other, endlessly marvelling.
In this marvelling the soul sees his God, his Lord and his Maker so raised, so great and so good in comparison with him who is made, that the creature scarcely feels like anything at all! But the brightness and clarity of truth and wisdom enables him to see and to know that he is made for love, in which God endlessly keeps him.
CHAPTER 45
God judges us by the substance of our nature, which is ever kept one in him, whole and safe without end; and this judgement is from his rightfulness. Humans, however, judge by looking at their changeable senses which appear as one thing and then another, depending on whether it arises from a higher or lower part, and which is then outwardly seen. And the wisdom of human judgment is mixed because of the many things it sees. For sometimes it is good and tolerant, and sometimes it is harsh and grievous. And in as much as it is good and tolerant it belongs to God’s rightfulness; and in as much as it is harsh and grievous, our good Lord Jesus reforms it through the working of mercy and grace in our senses, by virtue of his blessed passion. In this way, he brings it to rightfulness. And though these two judgments are thus brought into harmony and oned, yet both shall be known as separate in heaven without end.
The first judgement comes from God’s rightfulness; that is, from his high and endless love; and this is that fair and sweet judgement that was shown throughout this beautiful revelation, in which I saw no manner of blame assigned. And though this was sweet and delightful to behold, I could not be fully at peace; and this was because of the judgement of holy Church, which I had previously understood and which was continually in my sight; for by this judgement, I understood that sinners are sometimes worthy of blame and wrath. Yet I could not see God in either of these, and therefore my desire to understand was more than I can tell. For the higher judgement was shown by God himself, and therefore I must believe it; and yet the lower judgement was previously taught me by holy Church, and so I could not ignore this lower judgement.
This then was my desire: that I might see from God just how the judgement taught by holy Church is true in his sight, and how I should understand it. Then perhaps both judgements can still stand, and God would be honoured and I would know the right path. And to all this I had no other answer but a marvellous example of a lord and a servant, as I shall tell in a while, and one most powerfully shown. And yet my desire remains, and will do until I die, that I might by grace understand how these two judgements apply to me. For all heavenly things, and all earthly things that belong to heaven, are understood in these two judgements. And the more understanding, by the gracious leading of the Holy Spirit, that we have of these two judgements, the more we shall see and know our failings. And the more that we see them, then the more naturally by grace shall we long to be filled with endless joy and bliss. We are made for this, and our substantial nature is even now held in God’s bliss, and has been since it was made and shall be forever.
CHAPTER 46
Here in this brief life on earth, our sense-soul does not know who our true self is. And when we truly and clearly see and know our true self, then shall we truly and clearly see and know our Lord God in fullness of joy. It is therefore inevitable that the nearer we are to our bliss, the more we shall long for it, both by nature and by grace. We can have some knowledge of our true self in this life by the constant help and virtue of our higher nature. In this knowledge we can live and grow, carried forward by mercy and grace; but we can never fully know our true self until our last moment, when this brief life and our pain and woe shall be at an end. And therefore it is right for us, both by nature and by grace, to long and desire with all our strength to know our true self in the fullness of endless joy.
And yet in all this time, from the beginning to the end, I had two types of vision. The one was endless and continuing love, with secure keeping and blissful salvation, for this was the entire showing. The other was of the common teaching of holy Church, in which I was previously instructed and grounded, and which I have tried to use and understand. And my awareness of this never left me, for the showing did not stir or lead me from this understanding in any way. On the contrary, I was taught to love it and find it good, for by this I might, by the help of our Lord and his grace, increase and rise to a more heavenly knowing and higher loving.
And thus in all the beholding, I thought I needed to see and to know that we are sinners, who do many evils that we ought to leave, and leave many good deeds undone that we ought to do; and therefore deserve pain and wrath. Yet notwithstanding all this, I saw quite plainly that our Lord was never angry, nor ever shall be; for he is God, and a God who is good, life, truth, love and peace. His clarity and unity do not allow him wrath, for I saw truly that it is against the nature of his strength to be angry, and against the nature of his wisdom and goodness. God is the goodness that cannot be wrath, for he is nothing other than goodness. Our soul is oned to him who is unchangeable goodness, and between God and our soul is neither wrath nor forgiveness in his sight. For our soul is so fully oned to God of his own goodness that between God and our soul there is nothing.
And in every showing, the soul was led to this understanding by love and drawn there by might; and this is as the good Lord showed, and how it is in the truth of his great goodness. And he wills that we desire to learn it; that is to say, as far as his creature is able to learn it. For God wills that everything the simple soul can understand should be shown and made known; while the things that he will keep secret, he hides them mightily and wisely, out of his love. For I saw in the same showing that many secrets are hidden, which will never be known until the time that God of his goodness has made us worthy to see them; and so on this account, I am well content to abide in our Lord’s will in this high marvel. And now I yield myself to my mother, holy Church, as a simple child should.
CHAPTER 47
TWO things belong to our soul as duty: the one is that we reverently marvel, and the other that we meekly suffer, ever finding joy in God. For he would have us understand that in a short time we shall see clearly in himself all that we desire.
Notwithstanding all this, I beheld and marvelled greatly at the mercy and forgiveness of God. For by the teaching that I had before, I understood that the mercy of God was the forgiveness of his wrath when we sin. For I thought that to a soul whose meaning and desire is to love, the wrath of God was harder than any other pain; and so I took the forgiveness of his wrath to be one of the principal points of his mercy. But however much I looked or wished, I could never see this point in any part of the showing. Yet I understood and saw the work of mercy, which I shall tell of, God willing.
I understood this: that we are changeable in this life and that overcome by frailty, we fall into sin. We are weak and unwise, and our will is overwhelmed. In such times we are in a storm, full of sorrow and woe; and the cause is our blindness, for we do not see God. If we saw God continually, we would have no such mischievous feelings, nor the energy or yearning that feeds sin. .
This is what I saw and felt at this time; and I thought the sight and feeling was most high, abundant and gracious in comparison with our everyday feelings in this life. Yet I thought it was but small and low in comparison to the great desire that the soul has to see God. And I felt in myself five sorts of workings, which are these: enjoying, mourning, desire, fear and sure hope.
Enjoying, for God gave me understanding and knowledge that it was he himself who I saw; mourning for my failing; desire, that I might increasingly see him, understanding and knowing that we shall never have full rest until we see him truly and clearly in heaven. Fear was there all the time, for it seemed my sight would fail, and I would then be left to myself; and sure hope was there in the endless love, in which I saw that I would be kept by his mercy and brought to his bliss. And the joy in his sight, with this sure hope of his merciful keeping, gave me such feelings of comfort that mourning and dread were hardly noticed.
And yet in all this, I knew in the showing of God that this manner of revelation cannot be continuous in this life, both by reason of his own honour and that our endless joy might grow. And therefore we often fail in his sight, and presently fall into our self, where we find no feeling of right. There we find nothing but contrariness within ourselves, which is the old root of our first sin, with all the sins that follow from our contrivances. In this way we are troubled and storm-tossed by our feeling of sin and the various pains, both in body and spirit, that we know all too well in this life.
CHAPTER 48
But our good Lord the Holy Spirit, who is endless life dwelling in our soul, keeps us most securely. Working peace within us, he brings ease to our soul by grace, attuning it to God and making it willing. And this is the mercy and the way by which our Lord continually leads us for as long as we live this changeable life. I saw no wrath but the wrath in ourselves, and this he forgives us.
Such wrath is nothing else but pushiness and is contrary to peace and love; and it comes either from a failing of strength, wisdom or goodness; a failing which is not God’s but ours. For through our sin and wretchedness we possess a wretched and continual resistance to peace and love. And this he showed often in his lovely look of compassion and pity. The ground of mercy is love and the working of mercy is to keep us in this love. And this was shown in such a way that I could not have understood the nature of mercy except as it was found in love alone; that is how it appeared to me.
Mercy is a sweet gracious working of love, mingled with plentiful pity; for mercy works to keep us and to turn to all things to good. Mercy, by love, allows us to fail to a degree and the degree we fail is the degree we fall; and the degree we fall, is the degree we die; and die we must, as we lose sight and feeling of God, who is our life. Our failing is dreadful; our falling is shameful and our dying is sorrowful; but in all this, the sweet eye of pity and love is never lifted from us, nor does the working of mercy cease.
I gazed on the nature of mercy and I gazed on the nature of grace, which have different ways of working, though both are from one love. Mercy has a nature full of pity which belongs to motherhood in tender love; and grace has an honouring nature which belongs to the royal lordship, yet in the same love. Mercy works like this: it keeps, suffers, quickens and heals; and all is tenderness of love. Grace works like this: it raises, rewards and endlessly transcends what our longing and our labours deserve, spilling everywhere and showing the high and plentiful generosity of God’s royal Lordship in his marvellous courtesy; and all of this from the abundance of love. For grace works our fearful failings into abundant and endless solace; and grace works our shameful falling into high and honouring elevation; and grace works our sorrowful dying into holy, blissful life.
For I saw with certainty that just as our earthly contrariness brings pain, shame and sorrow, so does grace, working in the opposite direction, bring us solace, honour and bliss in heaven, surpassing all else. And this to such a degree, that when we come up and receive the sweet reward which grace has made for us, then we shall thank and bless our Lord, endlessly rejoicing that we suffered such woe. And we shall know a quality of the blessed love of God which we could never have known without passing through our troubles.
And when I saw all this, I could do nothing but admit that the mercy and forgiveness of God both quenches and diminishes our wrath.
CHAPTER 49
This was a great wonder to the soul, and one continually shown in all the revelations, and reflected on with great diligence: that our Lord God, concerning himself, cannot forgive for he is not angry; it is impossible. For this was shown: that our life is all grounded and rooted in love, and without love we may not live. Therefore to the soul - who of his special grace can see so far into the high and marvellous goodness of God, and sees there that we are endlessly oned to him in love - it is the most impossible thing imaginable that God could be angry. For wrath and friendship are two opposites. He who diminishes and destroys our wrath and makes us meek and mild, must himself be always one in love, meek and mild; and this is contrary to wrath.
I saw with certainty that where our Lord appears, peace also appears and wrath has no place. For I saw no manner of wrath in God, neither for a short time nor for a long time; for in truth, as far as I can see, if God might was angry for an instant, we would have neither life nor place nor being. For as truly as we have our being in the endless might, wisdom and goodness of God, so truly we have our keeping in the endless might, wisdom and goodness of God. For though we feel ourselves to be frail wretches, full of debate and strife, yet are we in all manner of ways enclosed in the mildness and meekness of God, in his kindness and openness; for I saw most clearly that our endless friendship, home, life and being, is in God. And that same endless goodness that keeps us when we sin, so we do not die, also leads us continually to peace and away from our wrath and contrary failing. It makes us see our need with appropriate fear, and passionately to ask God’s forgiveness with a longing for salvation.
And though we, by the wrath and the contrariness that is in us, now experience tribulation, distress and woe, as our blindness and frailty dictates; yet we are securely safe by the merciful keeping of God and do not die. But we are not blissfully safe, and possessors of eternal joy, until such time as we are in peace and in love; that is to say, content with God and with all his works and judgments; and accepting and peaceable with our self and with our fellow Christians and with all who God loves, as love invites. And this is done by God’s goodness in us.
Thus I saw that God is our very peace, and he is our sure keeper when we cannot find peace, and he continually works to bring us into endless peace. And so when we, by the working of mercy and grace, are made meek and mild, we are fully safe. And then suddenly the soul is oned to God when it is truly at peace with itself, for in him no wrath is found. And so I saw that when we are in peace and in love, we find no contrariness, and no means for that contrariness to rise up within us. Rather, our Lord in his goodness works to make it help us. For though contrariness is the cause of all our troubles and woe, our Lord Jesus takes them and sends them up to heaven, and there are they made more sweet and delectable than any heart can imagine or tongue can tell. And when we arrive there we shall find them ready, all turned into fine and endless honour. In this way is God our steadfast ground; and he shall be our full bliss and make us unchanging as he is, when we are there.
CHAPTER 50
In this life, mercy and forgiveness is our path and it leads us always to grace. The storms and sorrows we fall into may leave us as dead according to human judgements; but in the sight of God the soul that will be saved was never dead, nor ever shall be.
Yet here I wondered and marvelled with all the diligence at my disposal, saying this: ‘Good Lord, I see you are the truth; and I know in truth that we sin grievously every day and are much to be blamed. Yet though I cannot forget this truth, I simply do not see you apportion any blame. How can this be?’ For I knew by the common teaching of holy Church and by mine own sense that the blame for our sin continually hangs over us, from the first man until the time we come up into heaven. And this was my marvel: that I saw our Lord God showing us no more blame than if we were as clean and holy as the angels are heaven. And between these two opposite thoughts my reason was greatly troubled because of my blindness; and I could have no rest for fear that his blessed presence might pass from my sight and that I would be left quite unknowing about how God considers our sin. For either I needed to see that in God, sin was all done away with, or else to see how God sees sin, by which means I might truly know how I should regard sin, and the nature of our blame.
My longing endured all the time I gazed on him, and yet I could find no peace because of my great fears and perplexity. I was thinking: ‘If I assume that we are not sinners and not to blame, it seems as though I would err and fail to grasp the truth. Yet if it is true that that we are sinners and blameworthy, then good Lord, how is it that I cannot see this truth in you, my God and my Maker, in whom I desire to see all truths?’
Three reasons make me bold ask. The first is, because it is so small a thing; were it a large matter I would be more fearful. The second is that it is so common; for if it were unusual or secret, I would also have feared. The third is, I thought it necessary that if I were to live here, I needed to know the difference between good and evil, and by reason and grace, distinguish between the two so I might love goodness and hate evil, as holy Church teaches. I cried inwardly, with all my might, seeking help from God, and saying: ‘Ah! Lord Jesus, King of bliss, how shall I be eased? Who will teach me and tell me this thing I need to know, if all the while I cannot see it you?’
CHAPTER 51
And then our courteous Lord answered in a shrouded revelation, a remarkable parable, concerning a Lord and his servant; and he gave me understanding of both. This sight was shown doubly with regard to the Lord and doubly with regard to the servant. The first part was shown spiritually in bodily likeness and the second part more spiritually, without bodily likeness.
In the first sight, I saw two persons in bodily likeness; that is to say, a Lord and a servant; and immediately God gave me spiritual understanding. The Lord sat in stately fashion, at rest and in peace; the servant stood before his Lord reverently, ready to do his Lord’s will. The Lord looked upon his servant most lovingly and sweetly, and meekly sent him to a certain place to do his will. The servant not only went, but out of love, was eager and ran in great haste to do his Lord’s will. But he then fell into a ravine and hurt himself badly. And then he groaned and moaned, wailed and struggled; but he could neither get up nor help himself in any way.
And throughout this episode, the most mischief that I saw in him was a lack of comfort; for he could not turn his face to look upon his loving Lord, still close to him and his complete comfort. But like a man who was feeble and momentarily unwise, the servant turned his mind to his feelings and the woes he suffered.
There were seven pains in this woe. The first was the sore bruising that he took when he fell, a great pain to him; the second was the heaviness of his body; the third was the weakness which followed from these two; the fourth, that he was blinded in his reason and stunned in his mind, to such an extent that he almost forgot his great love; the fifth was his inability to get up; the sixth was most remarkable to me, and that was that he lay all alone. I looked around and saw no one, rich or poor, near or far, able to give help. The seventh was that the place where he lay was a large, harsh and grievous place.
I wondered how this servant could meekly endure all this trouble, and I watched carefully to see if I could perceive in him any fault; or if the Lord would assign any blame to him. And in truth there was none seen, for only the servant’s goodwill and great desire caused his fall; and he was as eager and as inwardly good as when he stood before his Lord, ready to do his will. And his loving Lord continued to see him in this tender manner. Yet now it was a two-fold gaze. One was outward, meek and mild with great compassion and pity, and this was of the first sight. The other was inward and more spiritual, and this was shown to lead my understanding to the Lord. And here I saw him in rejoicing greatly at the honourable restoration that he longed for and which he would bring to his servant by his plentiful grace. And this was the second showing.
And now my understanding was led back to the first sight, while keeping both in mind; for then this courteous Lord spoke his meaning: ‘See, see my loved servant, what harm and distress he has suffered in my service and for my love, and yes, for his goodwill. Is it not fitting that I reward him for his upset and his fear, for his hurt and maiming and woe? And not only this, but does it not fall to me to give him a gift that shall be better and more honouring to him than his own health could ever have been? Otherwise, I believe I would do him no service at all.’
And at this, an inward spiritual showing of the Lord’s meaning descended into my soul. Here I saw that it was necessary, by virtue of his great goodness and his own honour, that his dear servant who he loved so much, should be truly and blissfully rewarded, more than he would have been had he not fallen. Yes, and to such an extent that the falling and woe which he had suffered, would be turned into high and surmounting honour and endless bliss.
And at this point the showing of this parable vanished, and our good Lord led my understanding both in sight and in the unfolding of the revelation forward to the end. But notwithstanding this forward leading, my wonder at the parable never left me, for I thought it was given to me as an answer to my questions; and yet I could not grasp its meaning well enough to bring ease at that time. For in the servant who symbolised Adam, as I shall tell, I saw many different natures that could not possibly be found in Adam alone. And so at that time there was much I did not know; for the full understanding of this marvellous parable was not given to me at this time. There were three particular aspects of the revelation which remained a mystery, though I saw and understood that every showing is full of secret things. Therefore, I must tell you of the three areas in which I found some meaning at least.
The first is the beginning of teaching that I understood to be contained there at that time; the second is the inward teaching that I have since understood; the third is the whole revelation from beginning to the end; that is to say, this book itself, which our Lord God out of his goodness often brings to my understanding quite freely. And these three are so joined in my understanding that I cannot separate them. And by these three, as one, I have a teaching by which I ought to believe and trust in our Lord God; he of the same goodness which has been shown, and for just the same end. And from the same goodness and for the same end he shall declare it to us when it is his will.
For twenty years less three months after the showing, I received inward teaching, as I shall tell: ‘It is your task to take heed of the nature and circumstances revealed to you in the parable, though you think that they are unclear to your sight.’ I agreed willingly and with great desire, and inwardly focused on the points and properties shown at that time, as much as my wits and understanding allowed. I began my contemplating the Lord and the servant, and the way the Lord sat, and the place where he sat, and the colour and cut of his clothing, and his outward appearance and his inward nobility and goodness. I beheld also the way the servant stood, and the place, and the style of clothing, the colour and the shape; his outward appearance and his inward goodness and willingness.
The Lord sat in stately rest and in peace, and I understood that he is God. The servant who stood before the Lord, I understood to be Adam; that is to say, one man’s falling was shown at that time, to make it understood how God regards all people who fall. For in the sight of God all people are one and one person is all. This man was hurt in his strength and made feeble; and his understanding was stunned so that he was turned from the contemplation of his Lord. But his will was kept whole in God’s sight; for I saw our Lord commend and approve his will. But he himself was prevented and blinded from the knowing of this will; and this was a great sorrow to him and painful distress; for neither could he clearly see his loving Lord, who was so meek to him and mild, nor truly see how he was perceived by his loving Lord. And I know well that when these two are wisely and truly seen, then we shall have rest and peace here in part, and then the fullness of the bliss in heaven, by his abundant grace.
And this was the beginning of a teaching I saw at that time, by which I came to know how he beholds our sin. And then I saw that only pain blames and punishes, while our courteous Lord comforts us and sorrows, remaining always in glad cheer towards the soul, longing to bring us to his bliss.
The place where the Lord sat was simple; it was on barren earth in a desert, alone in wilderness. His clothing was ample and gorgeous, as becomes a Lord; the colour of his cloth was blue as azure, most solemn and fair. His appearance was merciful and the colour of his face was light bronze, with fair features. His eyes were black, most dark and attractive, outwardly revealing lovely pity while showing within him a watchful gaze that seemed to extend to heaven. He gazed on his servant continually with this lovely look, especially after he fell, and I thought it might melt our hearts for love and burst them in two for joy. The wonderful look revealed a beautiful mix which was marvellous to behold: part of it compassion and pity, the other part joy and bliss. The joy and bliss surpassed the compassion and pity as far as heaven surpasses earth; for the pity was earthly and the bliss was heavenly. The compassion and pity of the Father was in regard to Adam falling, for he is his most loved creature; the joy and bliss was in regard of his dear son, who is together with the Father. The merciful look of his face of love filled the earth and descended down with Adam into hell, where with continual pity Adam was kept from endless death. And this same mercy and pity dwell with humankind until that time we shall come into heaven.
But in this life we are blinded and therefore unable to see our Father God as he is. And when in his goodness he wills to reveals himself to us, he reveals himself in a homely manner, as a man. Despite this, I saw clearly that we ought to know and believe that the Father is not man.
When he sat on the barren earth in the desert, it had this meaning: he made the human soul to be his own city and dwelling-place, and the most pleasing aspect of all his works. Since Adam fell into sorrow and pain, he was not fit to serve in noble office. But our Lord Father remove himself elsewhere; instead, he sits on earth amongst humankind, until the time when by grace his dear son has once again brought his city into noble beauty through his hard travail.
The blueness of the clothing signifies his steadfastness; the brownness of his fair face, with his winning dark eyes, spoke only of his holy purpose. The length and breadth of his garments, which were fine and flaming, signified that he has, enclosed in himself, all heavens, joy and high reward. And this was shown in a moment, where I have said, ‘My understanding was led into the Lord’. In this inward showing I saw him rejoice greatly at the honourable restoration that he wills and shall bring to his servant by his plentiful grace.
And yet I marvelled, as I beheld the Lord and the servant. I saw the Lord sit in state and the servant stand reverently before his Lord. In the servant there is a double meaning, one outer and one inner. Outwardly, he was dressed simply, as a labourer ready for his toil. He stood very near the Lord; not in front of him, but to one side, on the left. His clothing was a white smock, single, old and stained deep with the sweat of his body. It fell straight and short, about a hand span beneath the knee, and was threadbare, as though it would soon be worn out; ready to be ragged and ripped. And I marvelled greatly at this, thinking: ‘This is inappropriate clothing for a servant who is so greatly loved, to stand in before so honourable a Lord!’ And I saw within him a ground of love. Such a love he had for his Lord which was the same as the love the Lord had for him!
The wisdom of the servant saw inwardly that there was one thing to do which would honour the Lord. And the servant, out of love, having no regard for himself nor for anything which might befall him, speedily set off and ran at the sending of his Lord, to do that thing which was his will and his worship. For it seemed by his outward clothing that he had been a constant labourer for long time; yet by the inward sight I had of both the Lord and the servant, it seemed that he was a new labourer; that is to say, one just starting his work who had never been sent out before.
There was a treasure in the earth which the Lord loved. I marvelled and wondered what it might be, and I was answered in my understanding: ‘It is a food which is delightful and pleasant to the Lord.’ I saw the Lord sit as a man, and I saw neither meat nor drink with which to serve him. This was one marvel. Another marvel was that this majestic Lord had only one servant, and he was sent out. I watched, thinking ‘What sort of labour should the servant do?’ And then I understood that he should do the greatest labour and hardest work; that is, he should be a gardener, delving and diking, toiling and sweating, turning the earth upside-down, digging deep and watering the plants in their time. And he should continue in this labour and make sweet floods to run, and noble and abundant fruits to spring, which he could then bring before the Lord to serve him as he desires. And he would never again turn away until he had prepared this food and made it ready, as he knew it pleased the Lord. And then he would take this food, with the drink, and bear it honourably before the Lord. And all this time, the Lord sat in the same place, awaiting his servant whom he sent out.
And yet I wondered where the servant came from? For I saw in the Lord that he has endless life within himself, and all manner of goodness, except for the treasure that is in the earth - though that treasure was also grounded in the Lord in the marvellous deepness of endless love. Yet it was not honouring to him until the servant had nobly prepared it, and brought it to him of his own accord. Without the Lord there was nothing but wilderness. And I did not completely understand what this parable meant, and therefore I still wondered from where the servant came.
The servant signifies second person in the Trinity and also Adam; that is to say, all humankind. And therefore when I say the Son, I mean the Godhead which is with the Father; and when I say the servant, it means Christ’s humanity, which is the true Adam. The nearness of the servant symbolises the Son, and the standing on the left side symbolises Adam. The Lord is the Father, God; the servant is the Son, Christ Jesus; the Holy Spirit is the mutual love which is in them both.
When Adam fell, God’s Son fell. Because of the faithful oneing which had been made in heaven, God’s Son could not be separated from Adam, and by Adam I understand all people. Adam fell from life to death, into the depths of this wretched world, and after that into hell. God’s Son fell with Adam, into the deep of the maiden’s womb, who was the fairest daughter of Adam; and for this purpose: to excuse Adam from blame in heaven and in earth; and to mightily fetch him from hell.
By the wisdom and goodness that was in the servant we understand God’s Son; and by the poor clothing of the labourer standing near on the left, we understand manhood and Adam, with all the mischief and feebleness that followed. For in all this our good Lord revealed his own Son and Adam as one person. The virtue and the goodness we display are of Jesus Christ; while the feebleness and blindness we display is of Adam. And the two were both shown in the servant.
And in this way our good Lord Jesus has taken on himself all our blame, and therefore our Father neither can nor will assign to us any more blame than he does to his own Son, the dear Christ. And so it was that he was the servant, even before his coming to earth, standing ready before the Father in purpose, until the time when he would send him to do that wonderful deed by which humankind was brought again into heaven. All this time he was God, equal with the Father as relating to the Godhead; yet foreseeing in his purpose that he would be man and save man in fulfilling his Father’s will. The is why he stood before his Father as a servant, willingly taking upon him all our charge. And then he set off readily at the Father’s will, and in time fell very low, into the maiden’s womb, having no regard for himself nor for his harsh pains.
The white smock is the flesh; the singleness is that there was nothing between the Godhead and manhood; the straightness is poverty, and its age is of Adam’s wearing. The stains of sweat speak of Adam’s travail; while its shortness reveals how the servant must labour.
And so I saw the Son saying: ‘Lo! My dear Father, I stand before you in Adam’s smock, all ready to start and to run. I wish to be on earth to do your will wherever you will send me. How long shall I wait?’ The Son knew full well when it would be his Father’s will and how long he would wait; that is to say, he knew it in relation to the Godhead, for he is the wisdom of the Father; for which reason this question was shown from the understanding of Christ as man. For all humankind that shall be saved by the sweet incarnation and blissful passion of Christ, are held in the humanity of Christ; for he is the head and we are his members. To those members, the day and the time when every passing woe and sorrow shall have an end and the everlasting joy and bliss shall be fulfilled, is unknown; the day and the time which the whole company of heaven longs to see. And all who are still under heaven or yet to come, their way is also by longing and desire. And this hope and longing was shown in the servant’s standing before the Lord, or rather, in the Son’s standing before the Father in Adam’s smock. For the hopes and longings of all humankind who shall be saved appeared in Jesus; for Jesus is everyone who shall be saved, and everyone who shall be saved is Jesus. And all this is arises from the love of God; with obedience, meekness and patience and all virtues that belong to us.
Also in this marvellous parable I have teaching set before me as though it were the beginning of an A.B.C., whereby I have some understanding of our Lord’s meaning. This secret things of the revelation remain hidden within it, given that all the showings are full of secret things.
The Father seated is a token of his Godhead; that is to say, it shows his rest and peace, for in the Godhead there can be no painful toil. And that he showed himself as Lord, speaks of his governance of our manhood. The standing of the servant speaks of travail; and the standing to the left means he was not worthy to stand directly in front of the Lord. His setting off was the Godhead, and the running was the manhood; for the Godhead set off from the Father into the maiden’s womb, stooping to assume our nature. And in this stooping he suffered terrible sores; sores that he took in our flesh and in which he so swiftly felt deadly pains. That he stood to the left of the Lord and not in front, signifies that his clothing was not honest enough to stand in front of the Lord; and that he neither could nor should take that position while he remained a labourer; nor also that he should sit in rest and peace with the Lord until he had won his peace faithfully with his hard and painful toil. That he stood on the left side suggests that the Father left his own Son willingly in human form to suffer all people’s pains, without sparing him. The ragged and ripped state of his smock is due to the blows, the scourgings, the thorns and the nails; the drawing and dragging, which tore his tender flesh. I had seen this to some degree previously, how the flesh was torn from the skull, falling in pieces until the time when the bleeding ceased, and then began to dry and cling to the bone. And by the struggling and writhing, groaning and moaning, I understood that he could never rise powerfully from the moment he fell into the maiden’s womb, until his body was slain and dead; until the time when he yielded his soul into the Father’s hands with all humankind for whom he was sent.
It was at this point he first began to show his might, for he went down into hell, and when there, he raised up the great root out of the deep depths which rightfully was knit to him in high heaven. The body was in the grave until Easter morning; but from that time he never lay again. For by then, the struggle and writhing, the groaning and moaning, was faithfully completed. And our foul and deadly flesh that God’s Son took on himself, which was Adam’s old smock - straight, threadbare and short - was then made fair by our Saviour, new, white, bright and endlessly clean; loose and flowing and fairer and richer than the clothing I previously saw on the Father. That clothing was blue, but Christ’s clothing is now a fine and alluring mix of colour, which is so marvellous that I cannot describe it, for it is too honouring.
Now the Son no longer sits on earth in the wilderness, but in his noblest seat, which he made in heaven to his liking. And now the Son does not stand before the Father as a servant before his Lord with fear, meanly dressed and in part naked. Rather, he stands before the Father as equal, richly clad in generous bliss, with a crown on his head of precious richness. For it was shown that we are his crown; and a crown is the Father’s joy, the Son’s honour, the Holy Spirit’s satisfaction and the endless marvellous bliss that belongs to all in heaven.
Now the Son stands not before the Father on the left side, as a labourer, but he sits on his Father’s right hand, in endless rest and peace. But this is not to say the Son sits on the right hand, side by side, as one man sits by another in this life; for there is no such sitting, as to my sight, in the Trinity. But rather, he sits on his Father’s right hand; that is to say, in the highest nobility of the Father’s joys. Now is the spouse, God’s Son, in peace with his loved wife, which is the fair maiden of endless joy. Now sits the Son in his city, very God and man, in rest and peace; a city which his Father has prepared for him in his endless purpose. And the Father is in the Son; and the Holy Spirit in the Father and in the Son.
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And thus I saw that God rejoices that he is our father, and God rejoices that he is our mother, and God rejoices that he is our spouse and that our soul is his loved wife. And Christ rejoices that he is our brother, and Jesus rejoices that he is our Saviour. These are five particular joys, as I understand, in which he wills that we find joy; him praising, him thanking, him loving and him endlessly blessing.
All that shall be saved we have in us already; for in this life there is a marvellous mingling of both health and woe. We have in us our Lord Jesus rising, and we have in us the wretchedness and the mischief of Adam’s falling and dying. By Christ we are steadfastly kept, and by his grace touching us, we are raised into the sure trust of salvation. And by Adam’s falling we are so broken in our feelings - and in many other ways by our sins and sundry hurts, which can make things so dark – that we can scarcely see any comfort.
But in our intent we remain in God, and faithfully trust to receive mercy and grace; and this is his working in us. And of his goodness he opens the eye of our understanding, and gives us sight - sometimes more and sometimes less - according to our ability to receive. And sometimes we are raised into the one, and sometimes allowed to fall into the other. And so mysterious is the mingling in us that we scarcely know in ourselves or in our fellow Christians how we are, in this strange mix of feelings. But that same holy assent - the same assent we give to God when we feel him - truly sets our will to be with him with all our heart and with all our soul and with all our might. And then we hate and despise our evil stirrings and all that might be the cause of sin, in spirit and body. Yet when this sweetness is hidden, we fall again into blindness, and then into all sorts of woe and troubles. But this is then our comfort: we know in our faith that by virtue of Christ who is our keeper, we do not assent to this; but rather groan against it and endure in pain and woe, praying for the time when he will show himself again to us.
And so we stand in this mingling all the days of our life. But he wills that we trust that he is lastingly with us, in three special ways. He is with us in heaven, truly man in his own being, drawing us up; and that was shown in the showing of the spiritual thirst. He is also with us on earth, leading us; and this was shown in the third showing, where I saw God in a point. And finally, he is with us in our soul, endlessly dwelling there, both ruling and keeping us; and this was shown in the sixteenth showing, as I shall tell.
And thus in the servant was shown both the mischief and blindness of Adam’s falling; and in the servant was shown the wisdom and goodness of God’s Son. And in the Lord was shown the compassion and pity of Adam’s woe; and in the Lord was shown the high nobility and the endless honour that humankind has come into by the virtue of the passion and death of his dear Son. And therefore he greatly celebrates his falling, for the grand raising and fullness of bliss that humankind has come into, surpassing what we would have had if he had not fallen. And it was to see this surpassing nobility that my understanding was led into God at the same time that I saw the servant fall.
And now because of this, we have reasons for mourning; for our sin is the cause of Christ’s pains. And equally, we have lasting reasons for joy; for it was endless love made him suffer. And therefore the creature that sees and feels the working of love by grace, hates nothing but sin; for of all things, to my sight, love and hate are the hardest and most irreconcilable opposites. And notwithstanding all this, I saw and understood in our Lord’s meaning that we cannot in this life remain wholly free and clean from sin as we shall be in heaven. But we can by grace keep ourselves from the sins which would lead us to endless pains, as holy Church teaches us; and avoid venial ones as our strength allows. And if we by our blindness and our wretchedness we fall at any time, we should readily rise, knowing the sweet touch of grace, and with all our will amend ourselves according to the teaching of holy Church, according to the grievousness of the sin, and go straight to God in love. We should neither, on the one hand, fall too low and incline to despair; nor, on the other hand, be over-reckless, as if it were an unimportant matter. But nakedly we are to acknowledge our feebleness, knowing that but for this keeping grace, we cannot stand for even the twinkling of an eye. And so we reverently cling to God, trusting in him alone; for one is wise as God sees it, and one is wise as humans see it. For it belongs to us meekly to accuse ourselves; and it belongs to the proper goodness of our Lord God courteously to excuse us.
And these are the two parts that were shown in the two-sided gaze with which the Lord looked on the falling of his loved servant. The one was shown outwardly, very meek and mild, with great compassion and pity, and came from endless love. And so the Lord wills that we earnestly accuse ourselves, truly seeing and aware of our falling and all the harm that comes from it. We are to see and learn that we can never restore it, and thereby earnestly and truly see and know the everlasting love that he has for us and his plentiful mercy. And graciously to see and to know both these things together is the gentle accusing that our Lord asks of us, and which he works in us. And all this is in the lower part of our life, as shown to me in the Lord’s outward gaze. In this showing I saw two parts: the one is humankind’s pitiful falling; the other is the glorious satisfaction that our Lord has made for us.
The other sort of gaze was shown inwardly; and that was a higher kind and all one. For the life and the virtue that we have in the lower part comes from the higher; and it comes down to us from the natural love within our true self, by the working of grace. Between the life of the one and the life of the other there is nothing; for it is all one love. And this one blessed love now has a double working in us; for in the lower part are pains and passions, mercies and forgiveness and other such things that are helpful. In the higher part, however, there are none of these, but just one high love and marvellous joy, in which joy all pains are wonderfully restored. And in this, our Lord showed not only our excusing, but also the glorious nobility that he shall bring us to, with all our blame turned into endless worship. The shall be when we are oned to the true self above.
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I saw that he wants us to understand how he takes the fall of any creature who shall be saved no harder than he took the fall of Adam, who, we know, was endlessly loved and securely kept in the time of his need, and is now blissfully restored in high and surpassing joy. Our Lord is so good, so gentle and so courteous, you see, that he can never find fault in anyone in whom he shall ever be blessed and praised.
And my question was partly answered in what I have just described and my great difficulty in some measure eased, by the lovely, gracious showing of our good Lord. In the showing I saw and understood clearly that in every soul who shall be saved, is a godly will that never assented to sin, nor ever shall; and this will is so good that it may never will evil, but always and continually wills good and works good in the sight of God. Therefore our Lord wills that we know this in both faith and belief; and especially that we receive this blessed will whole and safe in our Lord Jesus Christ. For by God’s righteousness, the same human nature that shall fill heaven, must first have been knit and oned to him; and so in this nature was kept a substance which could never, nor should ever be parted from him; and that through his own good will in his endless foreseeing purpose.
But notwithstanding this rightful knitting and this endless oneing, the redemption and again-buying of humankind is still needful and helpful in everything, as it is performed with the same intent and to the same end that the faith of holy Church teaches us.
For I saw that God never began to love humankind; for the reason that just as the same humankind shall be in endless bliss, fulfilling the joy of God in relation to his works, so the same humankind has been in the foresight of God, known and loved from the beginning in his faithful intent. By the endless ‘Yes’ of the full Trinity in agreement, the second person willed to be the ground and head of this fair nature. From him we all come; in him we are all enclosed and into him we are all going, finding our full heaven in everlasting joy, by the foreseeing purpose of all the blessed Trinity from before the beginning of time.
For before he made us, he loved us, and when we were made we loved him. And this is a love that is made from the kindly and substantial goodness of the Holy Spirit; mighty in reason, from the might of the Father; and wise in mind, from the wisdom of the Son. And in this way the human soul is made by God and in the same point is knit to God.
And thus I understand that the human soul is made of nothing; that is to say, it is made but made from nothing. And so, when God wished to make a human, he took the clay of earth, which is a mingled mass, and created a body. By this means he made the human body. But as to the making of our soul, he took nothing, but simply made it. And thus is the one made from nature, rightfully oned to the maker, who is substantial nature and not made; that is, God. And therefore it is so that there can and should be nothing between God and our soul.
And in this endless love our soul is kept whole, as the content of the revelations signifies and shows; and in this endless love we are led and kept by God and shall never be lost. For he wills us to be aware that our soul is a life, and a life which of his goodness and grace shall last in heaven without end, him loving, him thanking and him praising. And just as we shall live on without end, so we were treasured in God and hid, known and loved from without beginning.
Therefore he would have us grasp that the noblest thing he ever made is humankind; and the fullest substance and highest virtue is the blessed soul of Christ. And furthermore, he would have us understand that the dear soul and substantial nature of humanity was preciously knit to him when made with a knot so subtle and strong that the soul is oned into God; and in this oneing made endlessly holy. Furthermore he would have us know that all the souls who shall be saved in heaven without end, are knit and oned in this oneing and made holy in this holiness.
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Because of this great and endless love that God has for all humankind, he makes no separation in love between the blessed soul of Christ and the least soul that shall be saved. For it is easy enough to believe and to trust that the home of the blessed soul of Christ is an exalted place in the glorious Godhead. Yet truly, as I understand our Lord’s meaning, where the blessed soul of Christ is, there is the substance of all the souls who shall be saved by Christ.
Let there be great celebrations that God dwells in our soul, and much more and yet greater celebrations that our soul dwells in God. Our soul is made to be God’s dwelling-place; and the dwelling-place of the soul is God, who is unmade. And it is a profound inner understanding to see and know that God, who is our maker, dwells in our soul; and an even profounder inner understanding to see and to know that our soul, which is made, dwells in God’s substance; of which substance we are all that we are.
And I saw no difference between God and our substance; it was all God; and yet my understanding took it that our substance is in God. That is to say, that God is God, and our substance is a creature in God. For the almighty truth of the Trinity is our Father, for he made us and keeps us in him; and the deep wisdom of the Trinity is our mother, in whom we are all enclosed; and the high goodness of the Trinity is our Lord, and in him we are enclosed and he in us. We are enclosed in the Father, enclosed in the Son and we are enclosed in the Holy Spirit. And the Father is enclosed in us, and the Son is enclosed in us and the Holy Spirit is enclosed in us: all might, all wisdom, all goodness; one God, one Lord.
And our faith is a virtue that comes from our substantial selves to our sense-selves by the Holy Spirit, through whom all our virtues come to us; for without the Spirit, no one can receive virtue. It is nothing else but a right understanding with true belief and sure trust - of our being: that we are in God and God in us, even though we do not see. And this virtue, with all others that God has ordained for us to receive, works great things in us. For Christ’s merciful working is in us, and we graciously find harmony with him through the gifts and the virtues of the Holy Spirit. This working makes us Christ’s children and Christian in our living.
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And so Christ is our way, leading us securely in his laws, while Christ in his body, bears us mightily up into heaven. For I saw that Christ, having in himself all who shall be saved by him, respectfully presents us to his Father in heaven. His Father receives the present thankfully, and courteously gives it to his Son, Jesus Christ. And this gift and working is joy to the Father, bliss to the Son and pleasing to the Holy Spirit. And of all the things that we do, it is most pleasing to our Lord that we enjoy the same joy which is in the blessed Trinity, because of our salvation.
And this was seen in the ninth showing, where I speak more of this matter. And whether despairing or happy, God wills that we should understand and hold by faith that we are more truly in heaven than on earth.
Our faith comes from the natural love of our soul; from the clear light of our reason and from the steadfast mind which we have from God in our first making. And in the moment when our soul is breathed into our body, when we are made sensual, mercy and grace begin to work, having care of us and keeping us with pity and love. By this work, the Holy Spirit forms in our faith a hope that we shall rise again to our substantial selves, into the virtue of Christ, increased and fulfilled through the Holy Spirit.
Thus I understood that the sense-self is grounded in nature, in mercy and in grace; a ground which enables us to receive gifts that lead us to endless life. I saw very clearly that our substantial self is in God; but saw also that God is in our sense self; for in the self-same point that our soul is made sensual, that very place is the city of God, ordained for him from before the beginning of time. He enters this city and shall never leave.
God is never absent from the soul where he dwells blissfully without end. And this was seen in the sixteenth showing where it says: ‘The place that Jesus takes in our soul, he shall never leave.’ And all the gifts that God can give to creatures, he has given to his Son Jesus for us. And these gifts he, dwelling in us, has enclosed in him self until the time when we are full grown and mature, our soul with our body and our body with our soul, both helping each other as we acquire the stature that our nature works. And then, in the ground of our nature, with the working of mercy, the Holy Spirit graciously breathes into us gifts leading to endless life.
And in this manner my understanding was led by God to see in him and to understand, to perceive and to know, that our soul is a made Trinity; like the unmade and blissful Trinity, known and loved from the beginning of time, and in its making oned with the maker, as I have mentioned. This sight was most sweet and wonderful to behold, peaceable, restful, sure and delightful.
And because of this worshipful oneing that was made by God between the soul and body, it must be that humankind is restored from double death; a restoration that could never be until such time as the second person in the Trinity had taken the lower part of man’s nature, to whom the highest part was oned in the first making. And these two parts were in Christ, the higher and the lower, yet still one soul. The higher part was one in peace with God, in full joy and bliss; the lower part, which is the sense-self, suffered for the salvation of humankind.
And these two parts were seen and felt in the eighth showing, in which my body was filled with a feeling and awareness of Christ’s passion and his death. And alongside this was a subtle feeling and secret inner sight of the high part which I was shown at the same time when I could not, despite the friendly offer made to me, look up into heaven; and that was because of that mighty beholding that I had of the inner life. This inner life is that high being, that precious soul which is endlessly rejoicing in the Godhead.
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And so I saw quite clearly that we more readily come to the knowing of God than to knowing our own soul. For our soul is so deep-grounded in God, and so endlessly treasured, that we cannot come to the knowing of it until first, we have knowledge of God, who is our maker, and to whom our soul is oned. But notwithstanding this, I saw that to possess wholeness, we must desire wisely and truly to know our own soul; and so we learn to seek it where it is and that is in God. And thus by gracious leading of the Holy Spirit, we should know them both as one; and so whether we are stirred to know God or our soul, both of these stirrings are good and true.
God is nearer to us than our own soul; for he is the ground in whom our soul stands, and he is the strength that keeps the substantial selves and sense-selves together so that they shall never separate. For our soul sits in God in true rest, and our soul stands in God in true strength, and our soul is kindly rooted in God in endless love. Therefore if we wish to have knowledge of our soul, and enjoy commune and dalliance with it, it is necessary to seek our Lord God in whom it is enclosed. And I saw and understood more of this enclosement in the sixteenth showing, as I shall tell.
And with regard to our substantial selves and our senseselves, both together can rightly be called our soul, and that is because of the oneing they have in God. The worshipful city where our Lord Jesus sits is our sense-self, in which he is enclosed; and our substantial self is enclosed in Jesus with the blessed soul of Christ sitting at rest in the Godhead. And I saw most clearly that it is necessary that we remain in longing and in penance until the time that we are led so deep into God that we utterly and truly know our own soul.
And truly I saw that our good Lord himself leads us into this deep deepness in the same love with which he made us, and in the same love that he bought us by mercy and grace through the virtue of his blessed passion. Yet notwithstanding all this, we can never come to a full knowing of God until we first know clearly our own soul. For until the time that our soul finds its full powers we cannot be fully holy: and that is, until the time when our sense-self, by virtue of Christ’s passion, is brought up into the substantial self, with all the benefits of our tribulation that our Lord will bring to us through mercy and grace.
I had, in part, a touching from God and it is grounded in nature. That is to say, our reason is grounded in God, who is substantial being. From this substantial being mercy and grace spring and spread into us, working all things in fulfilling our joy. This is our ground in which we have our growth and fulfilment; for in nature we have our life and being, and in mercy and grace we have our growth and fulfilment. These are three natures in one goodness; and where one works, all work in those things which we long for.
God wills that we understand these things, and desire with all our heart to have a greater knowledge of them until the time when we are fulfilled; for to know them fully is nothing other than the endless joy and bliss we shall know in heaven; joy which God wills should be begun here on earth in the knowing of his love.
We cannot benefit from reason alone, but need also insight and love. Nor can we be saved by our nature grounded in God unless from the same ground we receive mercy and grace. It is from these three working together that we receive our goodness, the first of which is natural goodness. For in our first making God gave us as all the goodness as we could receive by our spirit alone; and then he gave further goodness, for in his foreseeing purpose and endless wisdom, he willed that we should be twice endowed.
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With regard to our substance, he made us so noble and so rich that for evermore we work his will and his worship; and where I say ‘we,’ I mean all who shall be saved. For truly, I saw that we are those who he loves, and who do what pleases him, lastingly and without stinting. And we do this by virtue of the great riches and the high noble virtues that are received by our soul in some measure when it is knit to our body; that is, when our sense-selves are made.
And so in our substantial selves we are full, and in our senseself we fail; and this failing God will restore and fulfil by the working of mercy and grace flowing plentifully into us from his own natural goodness. And in this way his natural goodness puts mercy and grace to work in us, and the natural goodness we receive from him enables us to receive the working of mercy and grace. For I saw that in God our nature is whole; but that he causes much variety to flow from himself to work his will to keep our nature which mercy and grace then restore and fulfil. And of these none shall perish, for the higher part of our nature is knit to God when it is made, and the lower part of our nature knit to God when we are made flesh; and so in Christ our two natures are oned. For the Trinity is comprehended in Christ, in whom our higher part is grounded and rooted; while our lower part has been adopted by the second person. I saw very clearly that all the works that God has done, or ever shall do, were fully known to him and foreseen from the beginning; and that for love he made humankind, and for the same love became man.
The next goodness that we receive is our faith, the source of all benefit. It comes from the high riches of our substantial self and into our sense-self; and is grounded in us through the natural goodness of God, by the working of mercy and grace. And from this come all other good things by which we are led and saved. Thus the commandments of God arise from here and we ought to understand them in two ways: one is that he bids us to love and to keep them; the other is that we ought to know what he forbids and to hate such things and refuse them. And in these two, everything we do is understood.
Our faith also produces the seven sacraments, each following the other in the order God has ordained for us, as well as all manner of virtues. For the same virtues that we have received from our substance, given to us in nature by the goodness of God, these same virtues are given to us by the working of mercy in grace through the Holy Spirit, yet renewed. These are the virtues and gifts treasured for us in Jesus Christ; for in the moment God knitted himself to our body in the virgin’s womb, he took our sense-self, and in that taking, having enclosed us entirely in himself, he oned it to our substance. In this oneing he was perfect man; for Christ, having knit in him self each person who shall be saved, is perfect man. Thus our Lady is our Mother in whom we are all enclosed and born of her in Christ; for she who is the mother of our Saviour is mother of all who shall be saved in our Saviour; and our Saviour is our true Mother in whom we are endlessly born, and never shall we come out of him.
Abundantly, completely and sweetly was all this shown, and it is spoken of in the first showing, where it says: ‘We are all enclosed in him and he enclosed in us.’ And this enclosing is spoken of in the sixteenth showing where it says: ‘He sits in our soul.’ For it is his delight to reign in our understanding blissfully; to sit in our soul restfully and to dwell in our soul endlessly, working us into him completely. And in this working he wills us to be his helpers, giving him all our attention, learning his lore, keeping his laws and desiring all that he does to be done, truly trusting in him.
For truly I saw that our substance is in God.
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GOD, the blessed Trinity, is everlasting being. And just as he is endless and without beginning, so is his purpose to make humankind endless, whose fair nature was first made ready for his own Son, the second person. Then, at his chosen time, and in full accord with the Trinity, he made us all at once; and in our making he knit us and oned us to himself; and by this oneing we are kept as clear and as noble as the day of our making. By virtue of this same precious oneing, we love our maker and seek him, praise him, thank him and endlessly enjoy him. And this is the effect which is worked continually in every soul that is being saved, which as I have said is God’s will.
And so in our making, God almighty is father of our substance; and God, all-wise is the mother of our substance, with the love and the goodness of the Holy Spirit, who is all one God and one Lord. And in the knitting and the oneing he is our true spouse and we his loved wife, his fair maiden; and with his own wife he can never be displeased. For he says: ‘I love you and you love me, and our love shall never be split in two.’
I contemplated the working of each of the blessed Trinity. And in this beholding I saw and understood these three properties: the property of the fatherhood, the property of the motherhood and the property of lordship, all in one God. In our Father almighty we have our keeping and our bliss as regards our substantial selves, which is ours by our making without beginning. And in the second person, in skill and wisdom we have our keeping as regards our sense selves, both our restoring and our saving; for he is our Mother, Brother and Saviour. And in our good Lord, the Holy Spirit, in his marvellous courtesy and high and plentiful grace, we have our reward and recompense for our life and our travail, which endlessly surpasses all that we desire.
For our whole life is found in this three. In the first we have our being, in the second we have our increasing and in the third we have our fulfilling. The first is nature, the second is mercy and the third is grace. Concerning the first, I understood that the high might of the Trinity is our Father, and the deep wisdom of the Trinity is our Mother and the great love of the Trinity is our Lord; and all this we have in our nature and in the making of our substance.
And beyond this I saw that the second person, who is our Mother as regards our substantial selves, is the same dear person who is our Mother as regards our sense-self. For we are doubly of God’s making; that is to say, both substantial and sensual. Our substance is the higher part, which we have in our Father, God almighty; and the second person of the Trinity is our Mother in nature, in the making of our substance, in whom we are grounded and rooted. And he is also our Mother in mercy, in taking our sense-self.
And so our Mother works for us in many ways, so that our parts are kept together. For in our Mother Christ we profit and increase; in mercy he reforms and restores us, and by the virtue of his passion, death and rising, he ones us to our substance. And so our Mother works mercy in all his children who are yielding and obedient to him.
And grace works with mercy, and especially in two ways, as was shown; a working which belongs to the third person, the Holy Spirit. He works by reward and gift. The reward is a generous and large present comprised of truth, which the Lord offers to those who have laboured; and the gift is a courteous working offered freely by grace, fulfilling and surpassing all that is deserved by creatures.
Thus in our Father, God almighty, we have our being; and in our Mother of mercy we have our reforming and restoring; for in him our parts are oned and we are all made perfect humans; and by this recompense and gracious gift of the Holy Spirit, we are fulfilled.
And our substantial self is in our Father, God almighty; in our Mother God, who is all-wisdom and in our Lord the Holy Spirit, God of all goodness. For our substantial self is whole in each person of the Trinity, which is one God. While our sense-self is only in the second person Christ Jesus; in whom is the Father and the Holy Spirit. And in him and by him we are mightily taken out of hell, and from the wretchedness on earth carried in honour into heaven and blissfully oned to our substance, increasing in riches and nobility by all the virtues of Christ and by the grace and working of the Holy Spirit.
CHAPTER 59
And all this bliss we have by mercy and grace; and it is a manner of bliss we might never have had or known had not the nature of goodness, who is God, been opposed; for from this comes our bliss. Wickedness has been allowed to rise against goodness; and the goodness of mercy and grace opposed the wickedness and turned everything to goodness and to worship for all who shall be saved. For it is the nature of God to do good against evil.
Since Jesus Christ does good against evil, he is our true Mother, and we have our being in him. In him, the ground of motherhood both begins and with the sweet keeping of love, endlessly follows. As truly as God is our Father, so truly God is our Mother; and he showed that in everything; and especially in these sweet words where he says: ‘It is I.’ That is to say, ‘It is I, the might and the goodness of the Fatherhood; it is I, the wisdom of the Motherhood; it is I, the light and the grace that is all blessed love; it is I, the Trinity; it is I, the unity. I am the sovereign goodness in all manner of things. I am the one who makes you to love; I am the one who makes you to long. It is I who is the endless fulfilling of all true desires.’
The soul is highest, noblest and worthiest when it is lowest, meekest and mildest. And from this substantial ground we receive all the virtues in our sense- selves by the gift of nature, and by helping and speeding of mercy and grace, without which these are of no benefit.
Our high Father, God almighty, who is being, knew and loved us before time began; and in this knowing, and in his marvellous and deep charity and the foreseeing counsel of the blessed Trinity, he willed that the second person should become our Mother. Our Father wills, our Mother works and our good Lord the Holy Spirit confirms; and therefore it is our part to love our God in whom we have our being, in reverent thanks and praise for our making, praying mightily to our Mother for mercy and pity, and to our Lord the Holy Spirit for help and grace.
And our entire life is found in these three aspects: nature, mercy and grace, from which we have meekness and mildness; patience and pity; and a hate of sin and wickedness for virtue must of necessity hate sin and wickedness. And so Jesus is our true Mother in nature by virtue of our first making; and he is our true Mother in grace by assuming our made nature. All the fair working and sweet kindly work of dear motherhood is appropriated to the second person; for in him we have this godly will, whole and safe without end, both in nature and in grace, and all from his own goodness, which is his alone.
I understood three ways of beholding the motherhood in God. The first is grounded in our natural making; the second, in the taking of our nature, which is the start of the motherhood of grace; and the third is in the motherhood of working and in that work is his spreading out, by the same grace, to the length and breadth and the height and the depth without end.
And all is one Love.
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But it is now necessary to say a little more about this spreading out, as I understand the meaning of our Lord. It concerns how we are brought again by the motherhood of mercy and grace to our natural home, where we were first made by the kind mother love which never leaves us.
Our kind and gracious Mother - for he wishes to be wholly our mother in every way - took up the ground of his works in the maiden’s womb, so low and so meek. And this he showed in the first revelation where he brought that meek maid to the eye of my understanding, in the simple state that was hers when she conceived. That is to say, although our high God is sovereign wisdom of all, in this low place he displayed and dressed himself in our poor flesh, fully prepared to perform the service and role of motherhood in all things.
The Mother’s service is nearest, readiest and surest for it is the heart of truth. This role could be done by no one in full except by him alone. We know that all our mothers’ bearing is bearing us to pain and to dying. Yet what is this? Our true Mother, the all-loving Jesus, he bears us to joy and to endless living, so may he be blessed! In this way, he sustains us within himself in love; and laboured painfully right to the very end, suffering the sharpest struggles and most grievous pains that ever there were or ever shall be; until in the end he died.
And when he had finished, he carried us to bliss; yet even this did not bring contentment to his marvellous love. And this he showed in these high and overwhelming words of love: ‘If I could suffer more, I would suffer more.’ He could not die again, but he would not hold back from work, and therefore he is compelled to feed us; for the dear love of motherhood has put him in our debt. The mother may give her child suck of her milk; but our precious Mother Jesus, he feeds us with himself, and does it, most courteously and tenderly, with the Blessed Sacrament that is our precious food for life; and with all the sweet sacraments he sustains us most mercifully and graciously.
And this is what he meant in this blessed word when he said: ‘It is I that the holy Church preaches and teaches you.’ That is to say: ‘All the health and life of sacraments; all the power and grace of my word; all the goodness that is ordained in the holy Church for you - it is I.’
The earthly mother may lay the child tenderly to her breast, but our tender Mother, Jesus, leads us in a homely way to his blessed breast, by his sweet open side; and there he shows part of the Godhead and the joys of heaven, with the spiritual certainty of endless bliss. And this he revealed in the tenth showing, offering the same understanding in this sweet word, where he says: ‘See how I love you!’ as he gazed down on his wounded side, with such joy.
This fair and lovely word ‘Mother’ is so sweet and so kind that it cannot be truthfully said of anyone but him; and to Mary who was his mother and mother of all. The property of motherhood is kind love, wisdom and knowing. And it is good, for though it is a fact that bodily birth is but little, low and simple compared to our spiritual birth, yet it is he that does it in the creatures by whom it is done. The kindly loving mother knows and understands the need of her child, and so she keeps it most tenderly, as is the nature and condition of motherhood. And as the child gets older, she changes her working but not her love. And when it is older still, she allows it to be beaten for the breaking down of vices, and to help the child receive virtues and graces.
This working, with all that is fair and good, our Lord does in them to whom it is done; and so he is our true Mother by the working of grace in our lower part, for love of our higher part. And he wills that we know this, for he wishes all our love to be fastened to him. And in this I saw that all duty that we owe, by God’s bidding, to fatherhood and motherhood, and for God’s own Fatherhood and Motherhood, is fulfilled in a true loving of God; a blessed love which Christ works in us. And this was shown in all the revelations and especially in the rich and mysterious words where he says: ‘It is I that you love’.
CHAPTER 61
In our spiritual birth, he uses such tenderness of keeping that it is quite without likeness, for our soul is of great value in his sight. He kindles our understanding, directs our ways, eases our conscience, comforts our soul, lightens our heart and gives us, in part, knowledge and belief in his blissful Godhead, by a gracious awareness of his sweet manhood and his blessed passion, with a reverent marvelling at his supreme and surpassing goodness. And he makes us to love all who he loves, for his love’s sake; and to be delighted with him and all his works. And when we fall, he raises us hastily by his lovely calling and gracious touching. And when we are thus strengthened by his sweet work, then with all our will we choose, by his sweet grace, to be his servants and his lovers forever without end.
And after this, he allows some of us to fall harder and more grievously than ever we did before, by our reckoning at least. And then in our ignorance we imagine that all we have started is worth nothing. But this is not so. For it was necessary that we fall, and necessary for us to see it. For if we never fell, we should not know how feeble and how wretched we are in ourselves; and also we should not fully comprehend the marvellous love of our maker. For we shall truly see in heaven without end, that we have grievously sinned in this life; yet despite this, we shall also see that we were never hurt in his love, nor ever less than highly prized in his sight. And by the test of this falling we shall have a high and marvellous knowing of God’s love without end. For strong and marvellous is the love which cannot not, nor will not, be broken by sin.
And this is one understanding of our benefit. Another is the humility and meekness we acquire by the sight of our falling; and because of this we shall be raised high in heaven; a raising we might never have had without that meekness. And therefore it is necessary that we see it; and if we do not see it, even though we fell, it would not profit us. It is common first to fall and later to see it; and both are of the mercy of God.
The mother may allow the child to fall sometimes and to be hurt in a variety of ways for its own growth; but for love of the child, she will never allow any manner of peril to come to the child. And although our earthly mother may allow her child to perish, our heavenly Mother, Jesus, cannot let his children perish; for he is almighty, all-wise and all-love; and no one else is like this, so may he be blessed!
But often when our falling and our wretchedness is shown to us, we are so afraid and so very ashamed of our self, that we scarcely know where to put ourselves. But our courteous Mother does not will that we flee away; for him there is nothing worse. Rather, he wills then that we behave like a child, who when hurt or afraid, runs hastily and with all energy to their mother for help. He wills that we do the same, as a meek child saying this: ‘My kind mother, my gracious mother, my dear mother, have mercy on me. I have made myself foul and unlikeable to you and I cannot amend it except with your help and grace.’ And if we do not feel eased straight away, we can be sure he will use the skills of a wise mother. For if he sees that it profits us more to mourn and to weep, then out of love he will allow it, with compassion and pity, until the time is right. And he wills then that we possess the nature of a child; a nature that trusts the love of the mother in good times and bad.
And he wills that we hold firmly to the faith of holy Church and find there our dear Mother, in the solace of true understanding, with the blessed community of saints. For one single person may often be broken, as it seems to them selves, but the whole body of holy Church was never broken, nor ever shall be. And therefore it is a sure thing, good and gracious, to will both meekly and mightily to be fastened and oned to our mother, holy Church; that is, to Christ Jesus. For the food of mercy that is his dear blood and precious water is quite enough to make us fair and clean; the blessed wounds of our Saviour ever open and rejoicing in our healing and the sweet and gracious hands of our Mother ever ready and diligent for us. For in all this working he adopts the role of a kind nurse who has nothing to do but to give attention to the salvation of her child.
It is his task to save us, his honour to do this for us and his will that we know it; for he wills that we love him sweetly and trust in him meekly and mightily. And this he showed me in these gracious words: ‘I keep you securely.’
CHAPTER 62
At that time, he showed me our frailty and our fallings, our afflictions and sense of worthlessness, our despisings and outcastness; indeed, all the woe I thought it possible to befall us in this life. And then he showed his blessed might, his blessed wisdom and his blessed love; and revealed that he keeps us in such times as these as tenderly and as sweetly in his honour, and as securely in our salvation, as he does when we feel in most solace and comfort. And from there he raises us spiritually and highly in heaven, and turns it all to his honour and to our endless joy. For his love never allows us to lose time. And all this is from the natural goodness of God, by the working of grace.
God is kind in his being; that is to say, that goodness that is kind is of God. He is the ground, he is the substance, he is the same thing as kindness; the true Father and true Mother of kind. And all the kindness that he has let flow from himself to work his will, shall be restored and brought back to him by the salvation of humanity through the working of grace. Different creatures possess this kindness in part, but humankind has the whole of it, in all its fullness and virtue, in fairness and goodness, in royalty and nobility, and in all manner of majesty, preciousness and honour.
Here we can see that we are all bound to God for our kindness, and bound to God by grace. And here we can also see that we do not need busily to seek far and wide to learn of different natures, but rather to go to holy Church, to our Mother’s breast; that is to say, to our own soul where our Lord dwells. There we will find all things now in faith and understanding; and afterwards truly and clearly in himself, in bliss.
But let no man or woman take this individually to themselves, for it is not so; only in general is this true. It was for our precious Christ, and for him alone, that this fair nature was prepared for the honour and nobility of humanity’s making, and for the joy and bliss of our salvation; just as he saw, understood and knew from without beginning.
CHAPTER 63
Here we can see that it is our true nature to hate sin, and the true work of grace to hate sin. For nature is all good and fair in itself, and grace was sent out to save nature, destroy sin and bring fair nature again to the blessed point from which it came, that is God; with yet more nobleness and honour brought by the virtuous working of grace. For it shall be seen before God by all his holy ones in joy without end, that nature has been tested in the fire of tribulation and no flaw or fault found in it. And so nature and grace are of one accord; for grace is God, as nature is God.
He is two in his manner of working, yet one in love; and neither of these is effective without the other, for they are inseparable. And when we by God’s mercy and with his help become one with nature and grace, we shall truly see that sin is viler and more painful than hell itself; there is no comparison, for it is contrary to our fair nature. And as truly as sin is unclean, so truly is it unnatural, and a horrible thing to see for the loved soul that wants only to be fair and shining in the sight of God, as nature and grace teach.
We must not be unduly fearful, unless fear is a help to us; but meekly we cry out to our dear Mother, and he sprinkles us in his precious blood and makes our soul full soft and mild; and in the process of time he heals us full fair, which is honouring to him and joy to us without end. And concerning this sweet and fair working, he shall never cease nor stint until all his dear children are born and brought forth. And this he showed me in the understanding of his spiritual thirst; that is, the lovelonging that shall last in him until Doomsday.
And so our life is grounded in the foreseeing wisdom of our true Mother Jesus from before the beginning; with the high might of the Father and the high sovereign goodness of the Holy Spirit. And in the taking of our nature Christ brought us to life; in his blessed dying upon the cross, he carries us to endless life; and from that time until now, and for evermore until Doomsday, he feeds us and helps us, even as that high sovereign kindness of his Motherhood hears our natural needs of childhood.
Fair and sweet is our Heavenly Mother in the sight of our souls; and precious and lovely are her gracious children in the sight of our Heavenly Mother, with mildness and meekness and all the fair virtues that belong to a child’s nature. For by nature the child does not despair of the Mother’s love; by nature the child does not rely on itself and by nature the child loves the Mother and each of the other children. These are the fair virtues, with others like them, which serve and please our Heavenly Mother.
And I understood that there is no higher state in this life than childhood; and that feebleness and failing of strength and understanding will be ours until our gracious Mother brings us up to our Father’s bliss. And then shall his meaning be truly known when he said in those sweet words: ‘All shall be well; and you shall see for yourself, that all manner of things shall be well.’ And then shall the bliss of our Mother in Christ begin anew in the joys of our God; a new beginning which shall last without end, newly begun.
And so I understood that all his blessed children who were born from him by nature, shall be brought again to him by grace.